How I Live A Simple Stress Free Life
After suffering from chronic fatigue for five years and battling chronic stress caused by perfectionism, people-pleasing and anxiety, I knew I had to make changes to my life for the sake of my health. Being naturally anxious, I consciously choose a simple life.
I regularly reflect on my situation and create a list of all things I consider ‘stressful’. I then reevaluate and look for solutions to decrease or eliminate issues in my life that are causing me unnecessary mental pain. These issues may be people, responsibilities, or even habits I have formed. I have adopted the following practices in order to lead a less stressful life and form healthier habits…
I only use my mobile phone for calls, messages, flashlight, calculator and camera. I don’t have any social media apps or emails. I have turned off all notifications so there are no sudden pings that make my heart race and put me immediately in panic mode. I use my laptop with a larger screen to check my emails and social media accounts. It does mean I am not as reliable or quick to reply to people, but it gives me more control over my day and how I spend it.
Each week I plan all my meals which in effect is less food and money wastage, therefore less stress. I feel more organised and know exactly what I need and the quantities. I will usually visit the supermarket once a week, which works for me. I get easily stressed looking for a parking spot and even wheeling a trolley, who will I bump into that I know and the list of irrational thinking goes on. If my plans happen to change during the week, I have the option of freezing things or gifting them to a neighbour.
I have made a conscious decision to eliminate negative energy people in my life. I just stopped attending or accepting invitations to events and outings when I knew those people would be attending. Basically avoiding them until they stopped contacting or inviting me. It may sound harsh but it has been worth it. I didn’t realise how much people were asking of me, abusing my kind nature and taking advantage of me until I removed myself from everything and everyone. Since loving on myself more, recognising my self-worth and self-confidence, I no longer let people walk over me. It is a powerful feeling. Surrounding yourself with positive happy vibes makes a huge difference to your stress levels!
I exercise daily. Usually a morning yoga session and then an afternoon weights and cardio training. Getting sweating and making my muscles ache always makes everything better. By prioritising my physical health, it makes a huge difference to my mental health.
I have a morning routine. I am a very routine person. I love routine. It helps to control my anxiety, keeps me disciplined and gives structure to my days. My morning routine involves drinking hot lemon water whilst filling in my gratitude journal and completing a bible study and praying. I do a 30-minute yoga sequence with breathwork. I then cook and eat a hot breakfast, take a shower, and apply my body creams whilst listening to an inspirational short podcast. My nightly routine includes meditation, a short yoga sequence and some intuition writing in my journal.
I don't own a TV. Being an empath, I am easily affected by negative news and programs. Watching television has never been a habit for me either. Growing up in a household with only one television, there was always slim chances of watching what you wanted, then later, as a teacher, there was so much pre-work and planning to do that TV was never a priority. Instead, I read a book for a couple of hours each night. I mix it up between fiction and self-help books, which inspire and encourage me.
I find arriving early when going to a new place or an event is very important for me. Sitting in traffic or the chance of getting lost, even finding parking and finding the right location adds to my anxiety so I ensure I always factor in plenty of time. I prefer to be early and sit and wait around for 15 minutes rather than panic in the car whilst driving.
I see a clinical psychologist when I need to. I'm not afraid to admit I see someone. I love my psychologist and if only you knew the difference that one can makes in your life perhaps you would see one too. If it is something you are considering, find one that specialises in your area of need: domestic abuse, anxiety, depression, marriage breakdown, etc. It took me four different psychiatrists before I found the right match for me. Being on a mental health plan helps reduce the costs of seeing someone. If it's not an option for you, then I hope you may have a loving spouse, family or friends who can take the time to just listen.
I make my life as simple and easy as possible. I stay organised to eliminate the stress of losing or misplacing things. Absolutely everything I own has a place where it belongs. You could ask me for any item, and I can tell you exactly where you will find it in my house. I love clear surfaces. Clear surfaces make me feel at peace and organized, which is an important value of mine.
I use a diary to keep track of events and ‘to dos’, so I don't forget, miss important things or double book myself, which would just add to my anxiety.
I decluttered my home. It was a long process, over five years. I only have things I use regularly in my house. I no longer buy bulk or impulse items. I write a list of what I might need, and if in two weeks I haven't reconsidered, then I will purchase it. I am proud to call myself a minimalist. I am not someone who needs items displayed around the home and cannot work effectively in a cluttered environment. Visiting my mother’s and older sister’s homes causes me huge anxiety due to the overwhelming amount they own and have piled around their house. Sadly they are places I do not feel comfortable visiting as I leave feeling overwhelmed.
I rent an apartment. There is no need to worry about gardens, maintenance, bins etc. Someone is employed to worry about those things for me. One less stress.
I have stopped multitasking or at least I make a huge effort to focus on one job or activity at a time. I complete it, despite how many steps it involves, before moving on to my next one. This way, I achieve more and feel greater success. I love lists, and once upon a time, my to-do’s for the day could fill a whole page. I was waking panicked each morning because I knew it would not be realistic to achieve everything; however, I would give it my best shot, even if it meant burning out. Now, I prioritise my daily tasks and work on the three most important things I need to achieve. Everything else is a bonus and if it doesn’t get done, there is always tomorrow. Giving myself permission to take one thing at a time and allowing for breaks has dramatically changed my mindset and, therefore, my anxiety levels.
Living a simple life for me means organising my clothes for the week, usually on a Sunday. I put together outfits ironed, clean, and hanging at one end of the closet, so no decision fatigue in the morning for me.
I ensure I have no debt stress. If I can’t afford something, I don’t buy it. I go without, borrow from friends or family or save hard. I live minimally, so there is really not much that I want or need. Being on a shopping band for two years also helped to set up good spending habits and ensured I used what I already had. You get creative as well. Planning different outings and catch-ups with friends that are not draining on the budget can be fun. Making things for your home is rewarding. It also helps with my stress levels.
Do you live a simple life? Or feel it’s time to put things in place? Feel free to join the conversation and share below what you are doing to decrease the stress in your life…